Monday, February 28, 2022

A LETTER TO MUMMY'S BOY

Dear Mummy's boy. 

I hope you are having a great day today. It has come to my notice that you are now interested in going into a relationship, and you are planning on getting married in a few years. 

I must say congratulation that you have grown this much, but I really wonder if you have only grown in size or you also grew in understanding. 

I hope you know you would have to stop being a mummy's boy if you are serious about getting it right in this relationship and marriage institution. 

I have met some of your colleagues who decided to do what you are about to do in the past, but they lacked the understanding of what it meant for two people to come together as husband and wife, and today they are very much single again or currently having a lot of difficulties in their marriage. 

Why I had to send you this letter right now is because I don't want you to make the same mistakes your peers have made over the years. I know as a mummy's boy, your mother comes first to you right now. She means the world to you, and she shouldn't stop meaning the world to you because through her, God gave you life. 

And for the number of years you have been on this earth, she has made a lot of sacrifices for you, and it's okay to feel very attached to her, especially as a single parent (maybe). But if I don't tell you this truth, you will mess things up. 

I want you to know that if you decide to date or even get married, there will be a few changes and adjustments that would need to be made. I know you love your mom, but the moment you get married, your wife becomes the most important person in your life. 

I know this sounds somehow, but that is the truth. That is how the institution of marriage was designed to be. Kids too come and go, but the one you marry is the one that will be with you for the rest of your life. 

According to God, the HOD of marriage. He said to seek God first, and other things will be added. He also said a man and woman would come together, become one, and whatever He (God) has joined, let no man put asunder. 

This means that to God, this is the marriage institution tree. 
1. God 
2. Your Spouse
3. Your kids 
4. Your Family (Father, Mother, Sibling)
5. The rest of the world. 
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You remember you got the name tag mummy's boy because your mom dictates all you do in life. My mom said this. My mom said that. My mom won't like it. My mom won't agree. 

Sir, if you don't learn how to stop this now, you may get married tomorrow, but you must get ready for a difficult marriage. The clash between mothers and daughter in law is most times due to the man not being mature enough to handle this situation. 

I am not saying you should stop listening to your mother or parents in general or caring about them, but the truth is that the moment you say I do, your spouse becomes the most important person in your life. This means that you protect her, keep her safe on all levels, listen to her needs and concern, and her desires come first. 

Some other people get married today and have kids and start to focus on their kids, forgetting who they married. I want to let you know that those kids will grow and still get married leaving you and your partner is still all you will have, and if you don't have a good relationship with her, you will understand the misery you have put yourself into. 

Two has become one. You are your partner, and your partner is you just the way your father and mother are one, and they put each other above other things. 

Something you should think about. 
What if your father put your grandmother above your mother and your grandmother called the shots in your father's house, and you couldn't get all your mom wanted you to have because your father refused to give it to you because your grandmother said otherwise, as a kid how would you feel and who do you think your mother would feel not being able to do things for you because your father won't listen to her because of your grandmother. Think about it. 

That's what it feels like when you allow your mom to decide what happens in your home. Your hurt your wife and kids. Be a man and run your home as a team with your wife. It's your home and not your mother's home. 

The nuclear family tree is Husband, Wife, and Children. I can't find mother or father there. So grow up in understanding, sir. I hope this letter meets you well. Talk to you later.

Ladies, share this with the men in your life.

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