Thursday, November 26, 2020


1. Marriage is not for quitters

2. You will feel proud of yourself looking back knowing that you honoured your vows

3. If you do marriage right, it will bring out the best in you and in your spouse 

4. Sex is important but not the only thing in marriage

5. When younger, make love as much as you can, enjoy it. A time is coming when all you have are memories 

6. Friends will come and go, you will know so many people as a married person, but keep your spouse your priority

7. Don't stay together for children, eventually they will leave you two. What will you have to hold?

8. Growing old doesn't mean you cannot make your spouse feel special, keep making his/her heart beat 

9. Do not harden your heart, otherwise marriage will be too great a burden 

10. Do not hold grudges, otherwise stress will kill you 

11. Eventhough you two are married, don't forget to build yourself, and work on your goals as an individual. Don't lose you 

12. Not every advice is good advice. Discern 

13. Love your spouse the best way you can, not as a reward to your spouse for treating you right, but because you have personally chosen to

14. It is not for you to say you are a good husband/wife but for your spouse to say I have a good husband/wife

15. Don't work too hard chasing after money for your family that you lose your family 

16. Praying for your spouse is your personal responsibility that you cannot delegate to another person 

17. Start each day with warm words and the tone of the day will be good 

18. Don't be scared of aging, be scared of aging without a purpose or a legacy in mind

19. As you work, think about retirement. Save, invest, plan. You will not always have the energy you have 

20. Fathers, don't disconnect from your children as they grown up. If you do, you will want them near you in your old age but they will struggle to bond with you 

21. Mothers, don't hurt your children with words. Mummy wounds are difficult to heal from 

22. Remember what you sow in your younger years of marriage, you will reap in your older years 

23. Marriage is possible if the two work on it 

24. You may pretend to the outside world you two are happy but behind closed doors, you two know the true state of your union. Stop living a public lie, have true love 

25. Every marriage has dark spots but the wise couple keep the light on

26. If you feel like quitting; step back, breathe, be objective and most likely you will realize you don't have to quit. Don't always trust feelings, wait them out 

27. One day you will give an account to God for how you treated your spouse, may God be pleased with you 

28. What a blessing it is to have lived having loved and been loved

Monday, November 9, 2020


Maybe it feels like everybody is waiting for you to make a mistake and everybody wants you to apologize, but you don’t have to. You don’t have to say sorry for the things you do because you don’t owe it to anybody. It’s your life and you shouldn’t live it in fear of other people’s judgments. If you feel like doing something and you do it and you feel good about it, why do you constantly apologize? These are the nine things you should never, ever, apologize for:

1. Loving someone

Being in love is a wonderful thing even though it might not be a mutual feeling. Just because you love somebody wrong or you love somebody who doesn’t love you back, you shouldn’t be ashamed of it. You should never apologize for loving no matter who you love. It’s your right and even if it was forbidden, it’s your heart that chooses, not you, so there is nothing else to do about it but own it.

2. Saying ‘NO’

You don’t have to make excuses or explain yourself. ‘No’ is a complete sentence and it doesn’t require a justification. What you fail to realize is that you say ‘no’ to millions of other things by simply saying ‘yes’ to one thing. You’re doing it without even knowing. So, why should you apologize for openly saying you don’t want to do something? It’s unnecessary and you need to stop. It’s your life and you get to chose what you want to do. If you don’t feel like doing something, then don’t. It doesn’t get simpler than this.

3. Following your dreams

You only have this one life and you’re the only one responsible for how you’re going to live it. You will be the only one to blame once you’re old and wrinkled for not living it the fullest and you’ll only be able to point fingers towards your mirror at the one who’s responsible. So, if you know all this, why do you feel guilty? The things you’re apologizing for now will be the things you’ll thank yourself for in future. Keep this in mind.

4. Taking out ‘me’ time

You need time to refill your batteries and sometimes, being around people can just be overwhelming. It’s OK to take some ‘me’ time. It’s more than OK—it’s a necessity. You don’t have to apologize for it. You will never need to apologize for taking ‘me’ time.

5. Your priorities

Just because somebody isn’t your #1 priority doesn’t mean you have done something to be blamed for. There are more important things in life and you’ve already lined them up from the most to the least important and that’s perfect.
The only thing you struggle with is your feeling of guilt. Well, if it doesn’t matter to you and if it’s not on the top of your list or if it’s not even worthy of being on your priority list, why do you keep apologizing? It’s your life—you get to chose your priorities. Everybody else who doesn’t approve may just move along and find somebody else to brainwash. You have your priorities straight and you should never apologize for it.

6. Ending a toxic relationship

Many people stay in toxic relationships for god-awful reasons. You should be proud to be smart and brave enough to leave your toxic relationship. You should reward yourself for that magnificent move—not apologize.

7. Your imperfections

If you read the sentence: “All your imperfections make a perfect human being.” would it make any sense to you? There are so many imperfect people out there and nobody even cares. Nobody is noticing your flaws instead of you. And if they are, then they’re probably just being assholes. You should never apologize for the things that make you, you.

8. Standing your ground

To dim your voice when you actually have a point is the worst thing you could do in this world. Just because somebody else disagrees doesn’t mean you’re wrong. Hell, don’t get intimidated when somebody gets angry and don’t apologize. Instead, stand your ground. You’ll feel better once everything is over and you’re right.

9. Telling the truth

If somebody can’t handle the truth, should you lie? Nope! You should never apologize for being honest and telling how things are. Even if it hurts somebody, even if it makes you lose a few people in your life—do it. There is nothing to be afraid or ashamed of, and there is most definitely nothing to apologize for. Wouldn’t you want to know the truth no matter how much it hurts rather than being comforted with lies?

It’s your life you’re living and nobody else’s. You don’t need anybody to tell you this. So, instead of dimming your voice and being a little scarred bird, why don’t you decide to own your thoughts, feelings, and actions. Those who care won’t mind and those who mind don’t care.

Sunday, November 8, 2020


What age does a man emotionally mature? What are the characteristics of an emotionally mature man and how can we recognize one?
When it comes to maturity, we all know that women are the ones who mature faster than the opposite sex – men.

To understand this better, just think of the days of your childhood or a little later on when you were in high school.
I’m pretty sure that you noticed how boys and girls behaved completely different.

Boys were always the ones who acted childishly in front of the girls, making fun of themselves and others for no specific reason, and so on. And later on, boys were always the ones who had issues with understanding their and other people’s emotions.

Over the years, some of these same boys never actually matured; they simple turned into emotionally immature men who are afraid of commitment and confused about everything else that has something to do with relationships.  But then, at what age does a man fully emotionally mature?

Being with an immature man can only make a woman frustrated, and his insecurities can cause the relationship to suffer and fail before it even starts.

Emotionally immature men are a real pain in the ass and every woman who has ever been with one knows what I’m talking about. Now, the real question is: at what age does a man emotionally mature? Well, according to a new study commissioned by Nickelodeon UK’s channel upon launching the new show Wendell & Vinnie, men don’t fully mature until the age of 43.  But, since this doesn’t apply to every single man on earth, I’m sorry to tell you that actually there is no specific age that maturity sets in. As a matter of fact, age has little or nothing to do with it.
But there are some things that are characteristic of every mature man and if your guy exhibits these 13 signs, you can be sure that you’re dating an emotionally mature man!


1.  His priorities have changed

He rather chooses to sleep than go out on a Friday night. He has got to the stage where nights out just don’t make sense anymore and now he would rather spend the night sleeping, relaxing, or just lying on the couch watching Netflix or playing video games.
It doesn’t necessarily mean that your guy is grown-up if he stays at home every Friday night, but it is a huge indicator that he has become more aware of how much sleep and rest are important for him and his health. It is a huge indicator that he’s miles away from immaturity. Also, another big indicator that your guy is emotionally mature is his ability to keep promises and stick to his decisions. For example, he promised you that you would go on a romantic trip together and in the meantime, his guys called him to go out with them, but he rejected them because he’s a man of his word and he would never disappoint you.

2. He forgives more

An important sign of his maturity is when he forgives something he wouldn’t have easily forgiven before. This is not easy to achieve and requires you to grow as a person first. To become more forgiving, you first need to become more understanding and open-minded, learn to not hold grudges, and control your anger. You see, the easiest thing a man can do is yell at you for the smallest of things and without any valid reason.
But if your man is trying really hard to work on his tolerance and overall behavior, you can be sure that he’s a real, emotionally mature man.

3. He respects differences

Respecting differences is surely one of the biggest signs that your guy is emotionally mature because it’s one of the most difficult ones to acquire.

While some people have this innate ability to respect and praise everything that is different, the majority of us have to work really hard on this one to reach the level of total acceptance and tolerance of otherness. If your man is mature, he’s probably aware of the importance of respecting humans of various sizes, abilities, ethnicities, and ages.
After all, the world would be a very dull place if we were all the same and it’s the incredible diversity among people throughout the world that makes it such a fascinating place. If the man you’re dating is aware of all of that and doesn’t show any signs of being disrespectful toward different behaviors, styles, backgrounds, and preferences, then it’s clear he is mature enough for you.

4. He shows feelings

Emotionally mature men don’t suppress their feelings, even though they are taught to do so. They know that acting tough and strong are not signs of maturity, but welcoming their feelings is. They also know that communication and being able to share things with you are some of the most important things when it comes to relationships. If your guy doesn’t have any problems with expressing his feelings to you and talking about his fears or dreams, you can be sure that he’s emotionally mature. Otherwise, he wouldn’t feel that comfortable opening himself up to you.

5. He avoids drama

You will recognize your man’s maturity during your first fight. By observing his behavior, you can learn a lot about him. An emotionally mature man will stay calm and admit if he’s wrong or sometimes may even prefer to stay silent rather than engage in a trivial argument. He never yells at you or calls you names because he respects you always, regardless of whether or not he’s mad. He also tries to calm you down and offers solutions if you have any problems. 
He is ready to do anything just to avoid drama and unnecessary arguments. Also, he doesn’t freak out when neighbours are listening to loud music. Instead, he’ll always have wise solution for every problem.

6. He creates space for you

An emotionally mature man will create space for his partner. This means being present, available, and open to having conversations with you. It means that he will stay put when he wants to run, and not judge you or be emotionally ungenerous when you need him. If you’re feeling sad, he’s always there to comfort you or make you laugh because he understands the emotions you’re going through and he wants to make you feel better with all of his heart. He also appreciates your need to have some space for yourself and he doesn’t judge you when you want to go out with your friends. This is a huge indicator of him being emotionally selfless and giving.

7. He is constantly growing

Being open to learn new things and grow as a person are clear signs of emotional maturity.
Every emotionally mature man knows that holding onto old patterns that are unhealthy will only result in experiencing the same problems over and over again. And that is why he is always open to seek advice from you and the people around him or ask for help regarding things he is not sure about. He is not afraid to show that he is not that good at something because he’s aware of the fact that you can’t be good at everything, and that the only way to grow is to be honest about your abilities and be ready to work on them. He works hard to become a better person. His ambition and motivation to become bigger and better will increase his maturity, strengthen your relationship, and fulfill not only his life but yours, too.

8. He respects boundaries

Emotionally mature men never hurt people or violate their privacy. He is confident enough to date an independent woman and he is willing to respect the boundaries she establishes in that relationship.  He never makes excuses about something he did or didn’t do, and if he hurts you, he makes sure to apologize and work hard to earn your trust again.
An emotionally mature man also sets and respects rules himself. He’s aware of the fact that nothing will ever change if he’s not willing to work on it. And that is why he’s determined to become the best version of himself.

9. He is close to his friends and family

This is often mentioned but it can never be stressed enough – that a man who can hold great relationships with the people around him is easily able to carry that over to his romantic relationship. Most guys have good friends who share the same interests, but only a mature man will stand out by being close to the people he cares about. You can see it in the way he talks to them and about them. He is full of nice words and compliments for them, respects them, and is always ready to spend quality time together with them, no matter how busy he is.

10. He is willing to have difficult conversations

Having vulnerable and emotional conversations is hard for everyone and especially men – they are mostly wired to have conversations filled with retelling of practical jokes, burping, rude words, and more silly jokes. An immature man often has a short attention span and he’s unable to follow you during conversation.  An immature man only focuses on himself during conversations where he brags about his biggest maturity failings – his crazy dance moves, his own farts, doing wheelies/stunts on his BMX, driving a modified car with a loud exhaust, his boy racer’s skills, or about time spent in night clubs.  Immature men talk about driving too fast or challenging another car at the lights or on the motorway.
They don’t waste their time talking about their skateboard only to hide their inability to talk about anything else. But if your guy seems to be comfortable talking about anything with you, or, even better, if he’s initiating difficult and proper conversations, you can be sure that he’s more than emotionally mature.  Another sign of being mature is if he’s always respectful toward your ideas and never criticizes or makes fun of you, no matter what you say. He is willing to listen to you and respect your every word no matter the circumstances; that is how you know that he’s a one hundred percent mature person regardless whether he’s 25 or 45 years old. 

11. He is compassionate and empathetic

If he sees an old person, he instantly jumps to help them cross the street or carry their groceries. He stands up for those people in need, no matter what. He is compassionate and empathetic not only toward you, but toward other people as well. Emotionally immature men are not that aware of other people’s needs and desires because most of the time they only think about themselves or they are simply confused about what they should be doing.  But if your guy exhibits these traits of being compassionate and empathetic with you and the people around him, you can be one hundred percent sure that he’s an emotionally mature man!

12. He knows how to take care of himself

He knows how to prepare simple meals instead of primarily living on fast food and junk food. An emotionally mature man knows how to take care of his body and spirit.  So, if he rather chooses weight-lifting at the gym and consumes protein shakes instead of only playing videogames till 4 AM and eating pizza, you know that he’s making important decisions regarding his health and he’s sticking to them.  An emotionally mature man seldom indulges in irresponsible littering and other slovenly behavior. Instead, he always make sure to clean after his meal and any other activity. He knows that if he doesn’t do it, no one else will do it for him – that’s one of the biggest differences between an immature boy and a grown-up man. 

13. He strives to become more mature

If he is emotionally mature, he became that consciously and he is constantly moving toward emotional maturity with intention. He is willing to move into the unknown, into vulnerability, instead of avoiding feelings and running away from them. He doesn’t merely hide under a cartoon bedspread and wait for his problems to solve themselves. 
So, if your man is working hard on his behavior, flaws, and other little things, he is striving to become a more mature person and he knows that this is the only way to reach it. He is aware that he’s not perfect, just like the rest of us, but he’s also aware that with hard work and strong will, anything can be achieved. And that’s the biggest sign that you’re dating an emotionally mature man who is in touch with his feelings, who is ready to go out of his way to help others, who is ready to reciprocate and work on your relationship just as you are.


Dear parents, you've home trained the girl child enough. You've inculcated good habits in them enough already. You've groomed them well. They are focused and are excelling. They've been adequately prepared for marriage.

 Thank you. Now can you please turn and face the boys. I don't know the kind of men you people are raising these days. Tell your boys they won't die if they pick their plates and wash them after eating. Tell them they won't suffer stroke if they sweep and mop the house. Teach them how to cook too, it won't reduce their manhood. Tell them they won't have hypertension if their rooms are kept clean. Tell them it is not a bad thing for them to wash their clothes.

Tell them their skin won't peel off if they bathe at least twice daily and their teeth won't fall off if they brush at least twice daily! Tell them they will still function well in the other room if they wash their boxers once or twice after using them! Tell them it doesn't cost a thing to be a honest man. The society needs virtuous men too so let them know it pays to be one! Tell them it is bad too for a man to be promiscuous! Tell them a man that shouts at his wife or raises his hand on a woman is a weakling and a beast! Teach them good manners. Stop saying "they are boys, house chores are meant for the girls, he will soon marry" etc You think when they marry, their wives will come and do magic in few years? It is not easy to change the habits of a full grown man. Let your focus not be on the girl child alone. Train the male child too. Don't let loose ill-mannered men into the society to come and trouble innocent responsible women.